IELTS Writing - Task 1 - Double Line Graph (Website Traffic Comparisons)

Monday, July 4, 2011

he graph below compares the number of visits to two new music sites on the web.

Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.
You should write at least 150 words.
Model answer:
The graph shows people using new music places on the Internet in fifteen days period of time namely personal choice and trendy pop music.

The overall trend shows fluctuation with slight Increased towards the end of the period.

Starting with Music Choice websites; 40,000 poeple went on this new site on first-day. Half of them backed out the next day. In Contrast to this Pop Parade net sites were visited by 120,000 music lovers on day one which decreased slightly on the next day thereafter regaining the same fame on 3rd day.

After 3rd day the enthusiasm for both music lines on Internet dropped slowly- reaching maximum fall of 40,000 on 7th day. Whereas Music choice gained popularity, slightly Improoving to get the original strength of 30,000 viewers on screen, but was getting still less visiters than their opponent Pop group i.e. 40,000 on day 7.

In the biegining of the next week both gained remarkable recovery after a few fluctuations for 8th and 9th day having 40,000 and 50,000 visiters respectively, reaching to their peaks of one and a half thousand new viewers for Pop Parade on 11th day showing a contrast of very few people visiting Music choice for the same day. Thereafter Music choice gained popularity on 12th day for having more than 120,000 new visiters on web.

In the end of the period Pop sites were visited by maximum viewers of 180,000 whereas sites located to Music choice were not explored by more than 80,000 explorers on the last day of the report.

(257 words)
This is an answer written by a candidate who achieved a Band 6 score. Here is the examiner's comment:
Well organized with some good linking devices and collocations (gain popularity, remarkable recovery, decrease slightly) and some valid comparison of the music sites. However, some sentences are long and confusing (paragraph 5), some collocations are inaccurate (slight increased, reaching to their peaks) and there is some repetition (7th day, 3rd day, 11 th day). Some words are spelt incorrectly (poeple, Improoving, visiters, biegining).

http://www.ielts-exam.net/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=446&Itemid=32

2 comments:

priya said...

will you rate this graph as I am taking exam in one week.

The line graph compares two new music sites on the basis of its visitors on the internet in 15 days period.
The overall trend shows fluctuation with slight increase towards the end of the period.
The number of visitors to pop parade music site was 120,000 on the first day which was three times higher than of music choice,40,000.Despite remaining stable for the first three days and undergoing an erratic movement in the next few, the figures rose 30,000 than the initial ones.
On the other hand music choice with 30,000 visitors also underwent a similar up and down movement.By the 12th day the figures went up thrice exceeding of that of pop parade. Irrespective of a fall in pop parade visitors on the 12th and 13th day,the figure rose steadily reaching 170,000 in next two days, whereas those of music choice,dropped by 50,000 from its maximum visitors of 120,000 on 14th day. pop parade concluded with maximum visitors of 170,000, on its 15th day which is much lower than Music choice visitors.
Conclusively, Pop parade is considered to be more explore than music choice.

Julia Robert said...

Thanks for sharing this nice post.The best way to improve IELTS Graph essay section is to learn through IELTS sample Graph.

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